Blog 2 of 5 · From the Cell to the Person
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
Attributed to Lao Tzu
How many times have you stood in front of a mirror and told yourself, “I am enough”?
Ten times? A hundred? Every morning for a month, with a sticky note on the bathroom cabinet just to make sure you didn’t forget?
And how did it feel? If you’re anything like most of the people who come to see me, it felt… a little hollow. A small voice somewhere at the back muttered, “No, you’re not.” And the voice usually won.
If that’s you, cheer up! There’s nothing wrong with you. You haven’t failed at positive thinking. You’ve simply been knocking on the front door when the answer is round the back.
What Lipton himself tells us
Here’s the interesting part. Bruce Lipton (whose work inspired this series) is very clear that positive thinking on its own isn’t enough. He points out that the subconscious mind runs the overwhelming majority of what we do, day in, day out, and that it was largely programmed in our earliest years, long before we could question any of it.
So when you repeat an affirmation, which part of you is doing the talking? Your conscious mind. And which part is running the show? Your unconscious. That’s rather like shouting instructions at the passengers while somebody else is driving the bus.
Why the voice argues back
Now, let me ask you a question. Why would your own mind argue with something kind?
Because, you see, your Unconscious Mind isn’t your enemy. It’s your oldest, most loyal friend. It holds your secrets. It remembers everything that ever frightened you, so it can keep you safe. And somewhere along the way it took a picture, an Emotional Memory Image, and filed it under important: do not forget.
So when you say “I am enough,” your unconscious checks the file. And the picture says otherwise. Not because it’s true, but because that’s what a frightened child once concluded. Your unconscious, being loyal, sides with the picture every time.
That’s why the affirmation feels hollow. It isn’t a lie; it’s simply arriving at the wrong address.
Lucy and the mirror
Let me tell you about Lucy. (Names and details changed, as always.)
Lucy was a teacher in her forties, bright, funny, deeply loved by her pupils, and quietly convinced she was a fraud. She’d done the lot: journals, vision boards, a year of affirmations. “I’ve said ‘I deserve good things’ so many times,” she told me, “I could say it in my sleep. I just don’t believe a word of it.”
“That’s fine,” I said. “Your unconscious doesn’t believe it either. So let’s stop arguing with it and go and see what it’s looking at.”
I asked her to notice the feeling she got when she said the affirmation, that little sinking in her chest. “If that feeling were out there in front of you,” I said, “where would it be?”
She didn’t think about it. Her hand went straight out, low and to the left. “There. It’s dark. It’s sort of… small.”
We didn’t dig for a story. We didn’t need one. We worked with the image: where it was, how big, how close, what colour. And after a little while she took a big breath, her shoulders dropped, and she said, “It’s gone. It’s just… not there.”
A few weeks later she emailed me. “I haven’t said an affirmation since,” she wrote. “I don’t need to. I just feel it now.”
See how that works? The belief changed on its own once the picture holding it up had gone.
The front door and the back door
Here’s the plain and simple truth of the matter. Affirmations knock on the front door: the thinking mind, the part that already knows you deserve better. The Emotional Memory Image is round the back, in the space around you, quietly running the show.
So rather than adding more words, we go round the back. We find where the feeling lives, we let the image change, and the belief follows like a shadow follows a person.
Does that mean affirmations are useless? Not at all! Once the image has cleared, kind words have somewhere to land. They become an echo of something you already feel, rather than an argument you keep losing.
So where do you start?
Pick one affirmation that has never quite stuck. Say it out loud, once, and notice what happens in your body. Then ask: if that feeling were out there, rather than in here, where would it be?
Don’t fix it. Don’t analyse it. Just notice where it is. You’ve just found the back door.
The MindReset app (on Apple and Google) walks you through this process step by step, at your own pace. And if what you uncover feels big, please work alongside a trauma-informed practitioner. Go gently; there’s no rush.
You were never failing at positive thinking. You were simply talking to the wrong part of you. Now you know where to look.
The From the Cell to the Person series
Up next: Blog 3: Beliefs Are the Symptom; the Image Is the Source →
- Blog 1: Lipton Explained Why. Here’s How.
- Blog 2: Why Affirmations Don’t Work (And What Does) (you are here)
- Blog 3: Beliefs Are the Symptom; the Image Is the Source
- Blog 4: Healing Without the Story
- Blog 5: Your Survival System Did Its Job Too Well
References
- Lipton, B. H. (2005). The Biology of Belief. Mountain of Love/Elite Books.
- Hudson, M. (2021). Frontiers in Psychology. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.716535
- Hudson, M. (2022). Frontiers in Psychology. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.947952